Back in the Black

Lots of things happened the night of my stroke. A lot of things stopped, and a lot of things started.  My recovery started, my retirement started, my new life started, and my love for God, well it didn’t start per se, but somehow it blossomed. And though some good things started, a lot of things also stopped. 

My business, for example, stopped. Stopped suddenly. Scheduling of subcontractors, getting deliveries, phone calls, what I was planning to do that week, just stopped. I couldn’t even tell the people I was working for what had happened.  And the job I was working on stopped, for a couple of months anyways, and when it did start again, it started without Hostetler Construction. Hostetler Construction was dead in the water.  Well, not exactly dead, the bills didn’t stop, just the income stopped.  

The health of my body and the health of my business, both took a hit. Obviously the health of my body is more important. But my business matters too. There are good ways to measure the health of your body. Vital signs like blood pressure, temperature, and pulse. For a business, it can be quantified as well with things like balance sheets and profit and loss reports. There is a bottom line.  

The bottom line refers to the bottom line of the profit and loss report. The bottom line of the profit and loss report of Hostetler Construction for the last two years was in the negative. I cut back everything I could. I drove my truck sparingly, I renewed my license as inactive, I canceled my liability insurance, and so on. No income, but still some expenses. I was sure it would ever be revived but maybe? For a couple years I was willing to wait and see. 

I have an announcement, Hostetler Construction is once again in business. I have been doing  some things, sporadically, that I have been paid for. On a whim, this month I decided to run a profit and loss report to see how Hostetler Construction was doing. I used to do that every month to see how it was going, but I hadn’t checked it this year at all. I mean, how often do you check the pulse of something that is dead? Well, sometimes, things that are dead can live again. Turns out, the bottom line is once again in the black.  Whoo hoo. 1038.08 in the black. That equates to 103.81 a month, not a living wage, but something. 

Hmm,  In business? 

In my mind, a business is for two things, to create value, and to make money. Those things are very entwined.  You need to produce something of value, something people will buy.  And the reason you do it is to make money. I like my job. I really like to make things that people want, to add value to their life. And, full disclosure, I also like money, because it adds value to my life.  It’s a win-win when it works right. And usually it does work right. 

As I look over my life I realize, on the dichotomy between making something of value and making money, I have been more on the side of “creating value” than on the side of making money.  I‘m not sure how wise that was, but, it is what it is. Or maybe, it is what I am. I am more a craftsman than a businessman. 

So in one sense, Hostetler construction was still in business even as I was recovering from my stroke. I still tried to do something of value.  I remember going back to the jobsite maybe six months into my stroke to pick up my tools and meet my friends at the jobsite, it was at a camp  that was a couple hours away, and I was living in a cabin a couple nights a week. It was sorta surreal, my tools were where I left them, my clothes were still in the dresser, my pillow was on top of the bed. Like everything just stopped. And on the job there was a big hole in the facing of the fireplace, it was for a tile mosaic, something I was planning to do, you know, before the stroke happened. I asked George, the chairman of the camp board, if I could try to make it happen.  And it happened. I remember that day we delivered it. My tile sub and I drove up. Actually he drove and he did all the work. I just sat in the truck and I then sat on a chair and I watched.  How lame is that I thought. On the other hand, as I think about it, How cool is that?  Wanted to add value. 

A couple months later, I remember a friend of mine asking me if I could still draw plans.  They needed a basic as-built plan for a thrift store, I said, “don’t know, but I will try.”  Man it was brutal, double clicking that mouse, figuring out the words for a simple note. But I did it. I didn’t ask for money, I didn’t want money. But I wanted to add value. And that drafting it turned into a one year journey into re-designing a bridge through the trees. Hundred of hours of relearning to draft and re-designing a really cool project. I was adding value to a worthy cause, Mile High Pines Ministries. I can remember telling Gabe, the director of Mile High Pines, I don’t want any money, not for me anyways, but my truck is sort of greedy, and it was decided to give me something for gas. Truck expenses, one of those things that was dwindling down the checking account, stopped. It was a turning point of sorts.

Fast forward to today, something I didn’t think I would be able to help with, is happening, we broke ground and started building the bridge through the trees. And I am employed. Two days a week, 4 hours a day. I’m not sure what I am, consultant, supervisor, helper, in charge?  Maybe all of the above. And I realize that I have something of value to add. 

That is my plan, that is my goal, to continue to add value wherever I can. And if someone wants to pay me for it, how cool is that. Hostetler Construction is back in business.